AUWins AUsome College Football Blog - Week 9

AUWins AUsome College Football Blog Week 9

This Week - The World's Largest Outdoor Collection Of Buffoons All Gather 'Round

Intro and Recap of Week 8

Good day to all of the loyal readers and followers of the AUWins blog.

Well, as you may have wondered after reading last week's entry good friends, something happened to AUWins. I was kidnapped by hooded liberals from Washington and in my place, Al Gore, Master of Disaster, wrote a FAKE blog with my name on it. THE NERVE!!! AUWins killed all of his would be kidnappers and sacked Al but not before he had put his rubbish out there for all to see under my good name.

Silly predictions such as Mizzou hanging close with Texas, and Rich Rod beating JoePa turned out to be just like all of Al's other outrageous predictions about the earth getting all hot and bothered. I will give Al some credit though for his other predictions which were pretty spot on.

I apologize for this inconvenience and promise that it will not happen again. I flew Al up to Antartica to exeperience global warming. He will be getting back to us soon to let us know just how hot it is up there now.

Week 9 Insights and Predictions

This is the week during the season where there is a lull in the intensity of the matchups. A couple here and there to make the weekend interesting...but predominantly a lighter weekend than most. That being said.....

The Extras From Deliverance vs. Da Bulls

Why bother with this game? I would normally say to take W. VA easily in this given how badly South Fla. looked last week. But I think that this game stays close through the fourth quarter. The bulls have a pretty decent team there and the game IS at S. FL. Can West VA pull out another sphincter episode? Okay...I'll give the Appalachian Rednecks another close V.

The Gay Turds vs The Toiletlappers

Hey, it's really the biggest game of the week if you live in the south. Not because the series has been a barn burner or anything lately, but because the rest of us can sit back and make jokes about how foolish both fanbases look making arses out of themselves at the biggest excuse for drinking known in America short of the Super Bowl.

Trivia fact: That vaunted hall of learning, uga, actually CANCELS classes on the Friday before the game every year so the "students" (cough! cough!!) can go to the game. Now there's academic integrity for ya!!

Seriously speaking, I honestly believe the cards are stacking up for THUGA this year. God's Most Beloved Son has been playing not only like a mere mortal this season....but just plain, downright AWFUL the past couple of weeks. TWO (2) pick sixes against Miss State last week??? Are you joking???????

THUGA had last week off. It's just setting up for a huge game for the mutts.

I think UGay gives the lizards everything they want and more....and wins. Yep! You heard it right here.

Colt McCoy vs "I'M A MAN!!! I'M FORTY!!"

If not for the Texas QB, the steers are an average offense with a really good defense. Okie State is a very potent offensive weapon....WITH THEIR LEADING WR WHO THEY DON'T HAVE ANYMORE!

I think we'll see UT start slow like they have every game, but it will be their D who will dominate and by the second half. On paper it should be a good, close game....but I think you'll see Texas have THAT breakout game in the second half and put it on "I'm a man!"

Straight Outta Compton vs Guys Who Actually Lived In Compton

(For those readers who are not as hip as AUWins (ha!) that is a hip hop reference for USC vs Oregon)

I think this will be the best matchup of the weekend! Oregon has looked really, really good ever since their opening season rendition of Ali vs Holmes at Boise State. What does this prove? It proves that when a coach gets rid of a thug...he only HELPS his program!!! Let that be a lesson to all of college football.

It's AT Oregon, and while AUWins has never been anywhere near the place, the reputation of their stadium precedes them. I realize that this Barkley kid has performed outstandingly on the road this year...but Oregon knows just how huge this game could be them and their bid for the Rose Bowl. I think it will close through 3....but in the fourth Oregon and their home crowd will tear it open and (here is the big AUWins prediction for the week!) win by 14!!

Tigger The Cuddly Tiger vs The Racists

Of all my predictions this year, one of the most dead on accurate was last week's prognastication that not only would lsu cover...but that the game in baton rouge would be over quickly and get ugly.

I've never been so sick to my stomach for being right in my life!

AU fans keep hoping that this hard turn southwards for Auburn ends that upcoming weekend. So far it hasn't. But while ol' piss has begun to play somewhat better in the last few contests, Auburn is just DUE!! Major due!!!

If my dear readers want an inside slant on an upset to make up some points/money this weekend, take Auburn to win. There have been a couple of developments behind the scenes this past week including the decision to let El Toro The Bull out of his cage (he had a huge game against the Asshat last weekend), and the defense will be clicking along much better than recently.

Well, that's a wrap for yet another glorious upcoming weekend dear friends. Keep safe and enjoy this most wonderful time of the year. Til next week, God bless and WAR EAGLE!!